apologies

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

Master Baiter Joined: 05 Sep 2014 Posts: 139

A statement was directed to me that i was encouraging a scam victim to ask Eaters if someone would bait her Lad. I did not and if you all feel I should terminate my membership, please let me know

Posted: Tue Sep 01, 2015 5:04 am

Are you asking the person who directed the statement toward you? If you're asking the general population then I doubt the majority will have any idea what you are talking about.

As far as asking members to bait a lad for a victim. This is a baiting site, so it's not wrong people ask that. Many members don't feel comfortable with this however and will discourage this from being done. Just like it's not wrong for someone to ask, it's not wrong to discourage this from being done. As far as Eater goes, there is no forum policy on that matter so even if you did ask, you didn't violate a rule.

There seems to be a misunderstanding so I suggest you PM a mod or the person you feel direct the comment at you. If you want the opinion of the general public you are welcomed to continue this thread. More than likely the person was merely trying to give you helpful advice. Whatever happened, you don't need to quit unless that's what you want to do.

Master Baiter Joined: 05 Sep 2014 Posts: 139

Thank you I have resolved the issue with the person who directed the comment. I don't want to resign my membership with Eaters, I have made alot of good friends but possibly an enemy but in any case, you have been very supportive and I feel very fortunate that I found this cite.

Master Baiter Joined: 05 Sep 2014 Posts: 139

the controversy seems to be that i contacted victims on scamwarners and as a victim i should not have done that because i am not trained in that area.

Posted: Sat Sep 05, 2015 3:18 am

^^^ Your post here and participation on SW are greatly appreciated.

The concern is victims need proper guidance like you got when you reported the scammer on SW.

We need to make sure the victim is getting the proper advice, research and how to move forward.

Often we find victim to victim interaction is not good. A victim needs to be healed and know how to help others.

We preach baiting safely. When you attempt to help a Vic are you doing this safely?

As you stated you are not trained in that area.

Most important is that scammers will often visit SW. They will contact victims with their help. Only to extract more money from them or convince them they are not in a scam. SW has to be careful this is not happening to victims. Not saying you are doing this but we have to be cautious.

As a baiting community and a victim awareness community you will find that we are non believers until you prove yourself.

You are welcome here and on SW.

The poster on SW that offended you was a non support member.

ETA: Who could help a poster on SW the best. A Baiter, victim or staff on SW?

Master Baiter Joined: 05 Sep 2014 Posts: 139

I am just going to read the posts and leave everything to you experts. don't know what i have to do to prove myself.

Baiting Guru Joined: 11 May 2004 Posts: 2163

You should read al my posts. It's magic

Footnote: I will sent you a PM(1)

(1)this may take while

Posted: Sat Sep 05, 2015 7:25 pm

It's a learning curve Gardenlady. Nobody gets it right the first time but if helping victims is your passion then talk to others who do it and learn from them.

I don't do much victim support but because I'm around in the mornings I do the best I can to help when there is someone in need of help and I'm the first one to find their request for help.

I agree with TMF's post especially with these points:

"Often we find victim to victim interaction is not good."
Recent victims who talk amongst themselves tend to go in Bad directions. The biggest thing they need to do is forgive themselves for being kind hearted enough to get scammed and move forward in their Real lives.

"Most important is that scammers will often visit SW. "
There are numerous occasions where Scammers have joined SW and started looking for new victims there. Some are obvious as they start spamming their scripts within minutes while others may target just one or two people hoping to stay under the radar.

"When you attempt to help a Vic are you doing this safely? "
It's important to be safe in Victim Support too. Many victims will fixate on the person helping them as their "New Crutch" to replace the scammer. In one case where I've seen this it turned out really bad.

If helping other Victims recover from their scams is becoming your passion. That is fine. There are never enough people to get the job done. But please try to contact someone who is already skilled at Victim Support and learn the ropes before doing it.

(Yup, another two cents please)

Posted: Sun Sep 06, 2015 1:41 am

@Klaasvaak

I seek revenge.

Your prank will happen soon. Not today or this month. Maybe not this year.

Not forgotten. Wink

Master Baiter Joined: 05 Sep 2014 Posts: 139

Victim support is something I would like pursue. I have been chastised for engaging in this because the person claims I am still in the healing stage. I know what I can and cannot do and interacting with victims has helped me.

Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2015 3:03 am

As Big Al said earlier in the thread, there is always a need for people to support victims, but as he (as well as Slightly in your other thread) also said, victim support can be draining and many victims will latch onto you and use you for emotional support and expect you to be there for them all the time, not to mention sending you every single email that they suspect may be a scam.

As you say, only you know what you can and can't do, but you need to consider exactly what you would potentially letting yourself in for - possibly having to deal with victims who have lost everything and are about to be thrown out on the street, or are even feeling suicidal after realising that they've been scammed.

Also, while you are not baiting, the principles of safe baiting still apply - it isn't a good idea to let victims have your real life details. If the scammer manages to convince them that they are legitimate, they could pass all of your details to the scammer as the person who told them they were fake.

Master Baiter Joined: 05 Sep 2014 Posts: 139

yes I understand all this and the folks I have connected with do not have all the intimate details of what has gone on in my life. However, I still want to pursue helping victims. I have contacted Scamwarners to inquire if there is training. I feel very committed to helping those who have been in the same position I was in a year ago. If i get a negative response, then I know it is not meant to be. I appreciate your response. Thank you

Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2015 3:49 am

How can I say this nicely?

Scamwarners does not have mentors.

Please feel free to PM. You can request my email address if needed. I can also phone you.

Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2015 10:18 am

Good Luck in your pursuit Gardenlady. I hope it works out for you.

Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2015 2:12 pm

I'm going to lock this. Gardenlady, please, if you need further help, TooMuchFun has offered to contact you. I think any further discussion should be off the forums by PM.