Found out my "love" was a scam.

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Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2014 2:02 am

After mths of exchanging emails & a few phone calls(on his dime). I got tired of his sketchiness. I finally googled until I couldn't see straight. It hit me to just google the last name.... low & behold, FIRST LINK shows me who this person REALLY is. I wasn't shocked but honestly it hurt... & I feel so stupid for allowing this to happen to me. There were signs, him asking for $--I never sent, THANK GOD!
I found the REAL person on Facebook & emailed him letting him know who is using his info & pictures. He's in the process of reporting this person, whomever IT is, for impersonating a US Army solider.
I still feel like SUCH a fool!!

Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2014 5:51 am

We don't recommend trying to track down the real person in the photographs you were sent.

At best, you found him, but there is nothing he can do - his photographs are out there and scammers will continue to use them. They're also not going to be worried about being reported for impersonating a soldier as they're using fake details and are located in somewhere like Africa or the Far East.

At worst, the "real" person you have contacted on Facebook is another scammer and he will now try to scam you.

It is also counter-productive to have the scammers accounts reported as it will only take the scammer a minute to set up another account and get back in touch with his victims with some excuse about being hacked. It also makes warnings at anti-scam sites like our sister site www.scamwarners.com useless as the new account he is using won't be listed anywhere until a victim reports it.

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 18 Oct 2012 Posts: 611

Hi Bella, I'm very sorry to hear about how you've been hurt. Conversely, I am so glad to hear that you aren't out financially in addition to emotionally. I know you might be feeling insecure, and doubting yourself and your judgement, but I want to tell you not to be so hard on yourself.

Remember that it is these scammers who are to blame for this pain. All you did was trust another person, which is a good thing. It's good to trust. As long as we exercise caution with whom we trust, there is no trouble. Love can be blinding...and if its been a long time then it makes sweet words all the more intoxicating. You made it out of this...the pain will go away eventually.

Just take care of yourself, be aware of the dangers, and you'll be fine. Smile

Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2014 8:00 am

Thank you both for replying... I keep telling myself I just need to be more careful.
You just can't help but think how stupid I was to fall into something like that.

Love can certainly be blind. I've learned if it sounds too good to be true, it's bc IT IS!

Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2014 9:52 am

Welcome to 419, Bella, and sorry that you're here under those circumstances.

But, with that being said, one thing you are not, is stupid. And, secondly, not a fool. You realized something wasn't right and googled (something those fools either don't think to do or don't know how to do). You were taken in by someone who is experienced enough to know just what buttons to push. Some of the ones that I bait are so smooth that, if I didn't know what they were up to, I could be fooled. Some of them are really good...unfortunately.

If you are using your real life information with him, drop him immediately. He will continue to try to get back in your good graces with all types of excuses...don't fall for them.

Just take time to heal, and if you want to see the best - and worst - of them, take time to read some of the romance baits posted here.

Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2014 11:09 am

Hi Bella,
Welcome to Eater. I am so sorry that you ran into one of these scumbags. They take much more than money, including their victims self-respect. You are NOT a fool-you ran into a person who does nothing but scam. You obviously had the good sense to wonder and Google him.

Please take time to let yourself heal from the experience. You may want to drop into our sister site, ScamWarners-they are experts at helping out victims.

I wouldn't have anymore contact with the person on FaceBook. Scammers tend to reuse picture and you don't really know who you're talking to. Block the scammer and anyone connected with him. Cut them out of your life.

Master Baiter Joined: 05 Sep 2014 Posts: 139

Hi: I am new to Eater, joined in Sept after I was scammed. This person found me on FB last January and for months we exchanged e-mails and dialogue on Yahoo Messenger. The scammers seem to like Yahoo. I felt the same way you did but got alot of support from the wonderful people here. Don't blame yourself. Alot of innocent people get sucked up into the lies. Alot of them use the same script. They try and flatter you ; declare that you are the person of their dreams then they start asking for help. Right now they are eager for money for the holiday season. They are heartless.

Just a warning: If a Ben [email protected] contacts you, ignore him. He scammed me. If you google him, you can read all about him. He has been in business since 08. Another one that tried to scam me is Luis Coleman; can't remember his e-mail address. Recently, this guy e-mailed me and used the same script that Stiller used. From my experience I can now spot a scammer. Whatever you do, don't let them know you know. My mentor is Sweet Poison and she is wonderful. She can give you alot of good advice.

Anytime you what to chat, feel free to contact me. My user name is garden lady.

I want to start baiting scammers but my mentor thinks its too early and I may just want to bait for the wrong reasons and she may be right.

Take care of yourself and try not to dwell on what happened like I did.

garden lady

Posted: Thu Dec 04, 2014 8:04 am

Thank you for the kind words... It is true, these people have no hearts. I can't understand why they(or anyone for that matter) would use people(after looking around, it's women scamming too.) just to gain money?

I was lucky to not have sent any to him, despite his many many MANY reasons & excuses I needed too. His last was bc he started drinking "heavily" & borrowed $1,700 from his co-workers over the mths we weren't speaking & they were "threatening" to go to his boss & that would stop the "early leave" he had put in request for.
He got ugly w/me when I told him I didn't have it. Reason why was not an excuse, I've lived w/panic attacks my whole life & sometimes they become so violent I end up hospitalized; which is what had happened. Ambulance bill, ER visit + hospital stay isn't cheap & he was promising he'd pay it back. I kept saying if I had it, I wouldn't be paying monthly payments to the people that saved my dang life!

I know as of right now, I couldn't bait bc I'd just want to hurt whomever I am in contact w/knowing what they are all about. Eventually, I may be able too...at least I'm hoping so. That way I can help others when they've been used by these vile people.
Right now, I'm going to sit back & chill for awhile knowing "in time, this too shall pass..." Exclamation

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 31 Oct 2014 Posts: 9

BellaSarayu wrote:

After mths of exchanging emails & a few phone calls(on his dime). I got tired of his sketchiness. I finally googled until I couldn't see straight. It hit me to just google the last name.... low & behold, FIRST LINK shows me who this person REALLY is. I wasn't shocked but honestly it hurt... & I feel so stupid for allowing this to happen to me. There were signs, him asking for $--I never sent, THANK GOD! rar password cracker
I found the REAL person on Facebook & emailed him letting him know who is using his info & pictures. He's in the process of reporting this person, whomever IT is, for impersonating a US Army solider.
I still feel like SUCH a fool!!

There are people like this all over the internet, sadly! I guess what you can say is that you learnt from your mistakes and you know what to avoid next time.

I hope your healing is quick!

Posted: Fri Dec 05, 2014 1:17 am

Hi Bella, it is very rough to find out you have been scammed There is a full range of emotions, from angry to sad, and everywhere in between. Your healing process will take time and I highly recommend that you don't try to bait for a long period of time. The scam stays fresh for some time and you will read many of the same words, or similar ones, over and over. It is hard to stomach and you have to be driven by something other than revenge for what your scammer did to you.
If you would like to have someone to talk to, please feel free to PM me. I have my own story about being romance scammed and I'm always willing to help another victim with their healing process.
And do remember one thing- you are not dumb. You reached out to someone who you didn't expect to lie to you and twist your heart. It is the cruelest lie of all, aimed at both your sense of compassion and your bank account.
Take care and take your time.

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