This is incredible!

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Posted: Fri Jun 19, 2009 7:16 pm

I received a letter from the FBI telling me I had money coming. This letter has to be the stupidest scam I’ve seen. Like this guy could be charged with “Dangerous Stupidity and Ignorance”, “Impersonating somebody with an IQ”, “Existing” and a few other felonies.

Here are some of the highlights of his letter. The excerpts are in red, my comments are italicized –

Anti-Terrorist and Monitory Crime Division
What, the FBI is investigating monitors now?

Customers Service Hours / Monday to Saturday
Okay, so now you can call the FBI and complain about a law? Of course they’ve outsourced their customer service to India anyway.

The New American President Barack Obama
Yeah, the FBI has to make sure we know they’re talking about the American President and not the President of the Nation of Morons.

and the Past American presidents treats the blacks in the America like slaves
Remember what Kanye West said about George Bush after hurricane Katrina?

Your New President Barack Obama had a meeting with the Nigerian President some weeks ago and for the fact, Barack Obama is a black man and will stop races in America
That’s why I voted for Obama. The first races he’s going to stop are anything over 5,000 meters. Those are just too long and too boring.

Therefore, we have contacted the Federal Ministry of Finance
Canada and the UK use the term “Ministry” so that means the US does as well. Wait, he might be talking about the actual “Minister” himself, the Reverend Luca Brasi.

Since the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) is involved in this transaction, you have to be rest assured
No, I don’t wanna be rest assured.

for this is 100% risk f procure
What the “f” is a procure

your Approval Slip on your behalf which will cost you $350.00 only and it is our duty to protect the American Citizens
The FBI really does need to protect us against really stupid people.

CONTACT INFORMATION
NAME: Chief Johnal Fred
EMAIL: [email protected]
Due to budget constraints we will now require all FBI employees to use hotmail accounts.

FULL NAME:
HOME ADDRESS:
TELL:
CELL:
CURRENT OCCUPATION:
AGE:
For crying out loud, you’re the FBI. You already have that information!

We order you get back to this office after you have contacted the ATM SWIFT CARD CENTER
You don’t order, it’s called a subpoena and/or warrant

and we do await your procurement of your Approval Slip after which the delivery of your ATM CARD will be in making payment response so we can move on with our Investigation and make sure your ATM SWIFT CARD gets to you
Uh?!?!?!?

Posted: Sat Jun 20, 2009 1:00 am

FBI-themed baits are among my favourites - not many trophies, but a lot of memorable lines as the Lads try to be all officious and arrogant.

Quote:

Be informed that the FBI will not fail to arrest you if we did not hear from you withine 48hrs since we have all your data as tendered by the complainant.

Quote:

Your inheritance which you are legally entitiled to could not be transfer to you because you fail to provide both ANTI-DRUG CERTIFICATE and ANTI-TERRORIST CERTIFICATE. Without this two documents, it will be difficult if not near impossible to transfer such amount of money... Now that we have step into this, you should not bother about all this as all you should do is stated therein. These measure came into existence after the terrorist attack in USA. The implication of this is that failure to provide this will not only attract arrest, you also risk being jailed for 15years without option of fine. Your immediate assignment now is to procure those documents and forward it to us so that your fund will be given a clean bill of health.

Quote:

We have every information about you during the cource of our investigation. The amount due for transfer is also known to us. Also, every other person you have contact with is known to us. But you have nothing to worry as we are only interested that you do not break the law. As long as you comply you will have no problem but if otherwise, you may have attracted the full force of the law to yourself. Respond immediately while i equally expect that you should have by then contacted the Barrister as adviced

Classic, huh?

Posted: Sat Jun 20, 2009 12:07 pm

Be informed that the FBI will not fail to arrest you if we did not hear from you withine 48hrs since we have all your data as tendered by the complainant.

I’ll give you 100 to 1 odds that even though he says he’s going to arrest him and already has “all your data”, he’s still asking for

Name
Address
Phone
Cell Phone
Occupation
Age

Posted: Sat Jun 20, 2009 12:19 pm

^^ I'd sort of slyly point that out to him when he asks for them.
Don't be too blunt though or he might realise what a dick he's been. Wink

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 29 Apr 2009 Posts: 18

this is FBI why are send to bad MTCN TO DIPLOMATICAGENT TELL US NOW IF YOU NOW SEND TO DO NOT TRY IT AGAIN BEFORE YOU GET YOU SF INTO BRLM

Sadly I have no idea what he is talking about - what is SF INTO BRLM ?