The Girl with the Kari-Blue Eyes

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Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2014 3:49 pm

Waking up to the Smell of Russian Bacon makes me feel a little less Hungover:

Quote:

Hi my love John.
ok, I write you information tour agency and I write you bank details for payment for the air ticket. Here these details:

Bank name: VTB 24 (JSC),
Adres: Moscow, Russia,
Swift code: CBGURUMM
Beneficiary: xxx
First name: VLAD
Middle Initial: D
Last name: IMPALER
A million kisses for you, my dear John.
Love and kisses

Posted: Tue Dec 09, 2014 12:45 am

I haven't been updating this regularly due to Sheer Laziness and it has gotten rather dull with all the send me a Receipt Crap:

Quote:

Hello, my love John. I again write you a long letter!!! I will wait from you the information and news, and I hope that you managed to send money that I could pay my ticket.

And again you in my dreams. And we with you together. And to us very good together. I hug you strongly-strongly. I consider that sincere embraces should be strong... As well as my feelings... Those pure feelings which I test to you. As to me it is pleasant that you with me in my dreams! In them we don't leave. Also we do not gather!

Because we lead the most fantastic and unforgettable minutes together. John, I want to give you all not dissipated love which has been collected in my heart. I yours. And you with me...I mentally I always with you. I will always support you a difficult minute. You hear? I with you. Know it. For now we together only in my dreams. But, I all the same dream about you .You know, what my dreams? They the most fantastic and light! And all thanks to you. I feel you.

Amazingly: even when you are far from me, I feel that you so are close; I feel your breath; a tangency of your lips; I hear your voice. I so love you, my sun! Very soon we will together.Only you and me. I want to make you happy. I know, you will make me very happy too. After all the love is a keen desire of happiness to the loved one. And you so are close to me!
I know you not so long ago, but even for the short period of our acquaintance you became for me the beloved. I as if know you very much for a long time. No, even earlier. And still before... Probably we were familiar in past life. Together by the unsinkable ship of love we will float on waves of ocean of unsolved passions, we will open doors in the world of unfulfilled desires.

Know that on light there lives the person, for which your name - not an empty phrase and which loves you very very much.

I love you, my John. You the best for me. Kiss you and hug. Your Anastasiya.

I didn't read it. I wonder what 'She' said?

Quote:

Hey there Little Lady,

Well I sure enough went to my Bank today to get that there receipt and
they done told me that the Money was returned to my account they did.
When I was askings them they said it was cause there was a problem
with that Agent's Account they did.

My Lover Gal I don't know much about this fancy Bankering but they
said maybe I needs to sends it to another account. You think them
Agent people has a new one cause I wants you with me real bad I do.

Love,

John

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2014 1:52 pm

Anal Stasiya's reaction to the failed transfer is pretty much what I expected:

Quote:

Hi my love John.
It is a pity to me that money has been returned back and that transfer has passed not successfully. Probably your bank does not permit to do trunk calls. I think it will be better and more safe to send money through system Money Gram, you can use it and learn in detail on a website www.moneygram.com. As you send money, a current of hour I can already receive money and at once make payment for the air ticket. It will be on much faster and is easier. If you agree, I will give you the data the following letter.
A million kisses for you, my dear John.
Love and kisses

Oddly enough John don't play that!

Quote:

Hey there Analtasiya,

I ain't so sure about that place cause it don't look safe like a Bank
to me. Couldn't you just get me another account?

Love,

I assumed the arguments to start but got this Schlock instead:

Quote:

My love John. At last I write you the letter, my John. as though good, if you were near to me now.
You gently would embrace me and would be very warm and cozy together to us. I know that we are divided by thousand kilometers but when I write to you,
feel that I whisper words of love to you on an ear...Also I know that you hear me...
I so want you to see in real! We soon will meet, I promise. I very much wait for this moment. Important only that we had enough patience to wait that moment when heart will jump out of a breast,
lips will repeat a favourite name, a brain as hours will be made by return readout, as at spaceship launch.
The ship which will lift us on a white, soft, fluffy cloud of happiness where we will stir, having lowered feet downwards...
Last night I long couldn't fall asleep. I so would like that you could hug me, tell that missed, to meet with you a dawn...
I have closed eyes, and for an instant it seemed that you nearby that I embrace you, kiss you...
But I understand that you far now and would be desirable to cry. But I won't cry, I promise, my love.
I love you so much and love only you, you know it. Kiss and hug you. Your Anastasiya.

The Fluffy Cloud of Happiness Indeed! some of the other stuff reminds me of an Ultimate Warrior Promo I once saw with the Spaceship reference and such but I digress....

Anyhow not long afterwards another bit of Joy comes my way:

Quote:

Hi my love John.
Why you do not want to send me money through system Money Gram? Or can be at you there is no such system? Is still CONACT, RIA. There can be you can look these systems? If you insist on the bank account I could ask the aunt about the help. It works in bank and it has bank details for the international transfer. I can ask the aunt about the help that it has received instead of me money. I can write you this data.

Russian Bacon should be coming soon.

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2014 3:00 pm

Yum! Boris should ante up a few piggies!

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2014 3:26 pm

^I'm not sure I've ever gotten more than two from Vlad before but I will keep plugging away.

Posted: Thu Dec 11, 2014 3:22 pm

Lo and Behold Account number two arrived this Morning:

Quote:

Hi my love John.
ok if you insist on transfer bank I write you bank details of my aunt. You can send money.

Beneficiary: VLAD
Account of beneficiary: xxx
Account With Institution: AVANGARD BANK, MOSCOW, RU
SWIFT: AVJSRUMM
Intermediary: JPMORGAN CHASE BANK, N.A., NEW YORK, NY, US,
SWIFT: CHASUS33

A million kisses for you, my dear John.
Love and kisses
Anastasiya

Posted: Thu Dec 11, 2014 4:15 pm

One down...

Posted: Thu Dec 11, 2014 4:30 pm

^No that's the Second one. Going for three if I can swing it.

Posted: Thu Dec 11, 2014 5:01 pm

'Tis the season-hope he'll ante up.

Posted: Tue Dec 16, 2014 12:04 pm

It does look like my Vlad is up for account number three:

Quote:

At me bad news, you need to be called in bank and to cancel transfer. Make it please because my aunt this morning has reported that that bank account has been closed and does not work. Money will not come into that account. Therefore you today since morning need to be called in bank and to cancel transfer of money. I regret about inconvenience, forgive that I have disturbed you and now because of me you should cancel transfer of money. I ask you it to make it is direct now. I do not want that you have lost money. I think I can ask the girlfriend. It can precisely help me without problems. Let to me know

I love getting confirmation from a Scammer that their accounts have been shuttered.

Quote:

Hey there Anastasiya,

I'll make sure I get to the Bank first thing I will and cancel that
there Transfer. Baby Doll if you can get your girlfriend to help us
that would be swell.

Posted: Tue Dec 16, 2014 7:32 pm

Account number three has appeared. This is a record (for me) with a Vlad:

Quote:

If you managed to get a refund and cancel transfer, it will be healthy. Forgive for inconvenience, it is a pity to me that has turned out so. I trust that your money still has not been translated. I ask to send you money addressed to my friend. I write you bank details of my friend:

Beneficiary: ANASTASIYA VLADKOVA
Account of beneficiary: xxx
Account With Institution: AVANGARD BANK, MOSCOW, RU
SWIFT: AVJSRUMM
Intermediary: JPMORGAN CHASE BANK, N.A., NEW YORK, NY, US,
SWIFT: CHASUS33

Posted: Wed Dec 17, 2014 12:17 am

Whoot! Number 3! See, I told you....

Posted: Sat Dec 20, 2014 1:46 pm

^ I'm still in shock! I will try for account number four though.

I've not had anything very interesting to say to Anal Tasiya but 'She'seems committed. There is plenty of Love to go around here:

Quote:

Hello, my love John. I write you letter again, because I can't don't write.
ok, on Monday I will ask the girlfriend to check up the bank account and I will let to you know if money has come. I hope that all will be an order and money will be for the air ticket.
I always try tell you, how much I love you, my John. I love you because you put a smile on my face. I love you because of your kindness and tenderness.
I love you, because you my dear friend and my love man. I love you and I want to be near to you. I want to hug you and to forget about all.
Only I and you. I love you because you listen to me and even if you don't agree with me, you listen with desire to understand me.
I love you because you respect me though you tease sometimes. I love you that you appreciate me. I love you the most. I miss you.
See you soon. Your Anastasiya.

That's a Whole Lotta Love eh?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mln0RciE2o0

Posted: Fri Dec 26, 2014 6:52 pm

There have been a few exchanges but nothing of note. Then my Baby Doll sent this Schlock. I actually read this one well some of it...

Quote:

Hello, my love John. I miss you and worry for you so much. I hope, you are ok today. Maybe my letter make you little better. It today little naughty . I hope, you will like it, my John.... I dreamed today as we will be together, my love. I keep mind how I lean against you, I feel your heat, I feel your breath in steam of centimeters from the neck. It is similar to delusion or the illusion mixed with elements of madness, but as is frequent we because of the excessively real outlooks on life meaningly we ruin in ourselves something fine...I want to think of the future, I have forgotten the past, and I live in the present, therefore and I address to you with a small fairy tale…
Imagine that we have appeared with you in a room where the twilight reigns. A penumbra and a semitone are capable to wake imagination and to give vent to imagination. The outlines are weaker, the more strongly they excite blood. In your hand a high crystal glass of the cooled champagne... Crystal, reflecting even weak light, gradually fills with it champagne. I would like to see during this moment that amazing shine in your eyes which emerges from depths of your soul, disturbed by a desire wave. I spend a hand on your neck...Gradually going down to a shirt, slowly, slowly I unbutton one button for another, then softly I plow up it and I to touch a soft skin on your breast. I nestle on it all being that excitation like electric current action has penetrated all sections of my body. I want to kiss you on the mouth — gently...gently... I want, that so was always and ahead still so many pleasures which it is not necessary to refuse... Embrace me, let your hands slide on my body, let will find that place in which something resistant to control... I want, that our hands were weaved and became similar to two ears in the field, clung to each other under the influence of a playful spring breeze...I love you, my sun. You are the best for me, my John. Kiss and hug. See you soon. Your Anastasiya.

Am speechless. Well almost:

Quote:

Hey there Analtasiya,

You sure do know how to Warm the Cockles of my er Heart this time of
year you do. That there letter sure makes me sad cause I wanted to
give you a Proper Goose this Xmas but was Swanned I suppose. Oh well
next year will be much more better I be hoping cause then you'll be
with me and later on we can perspire by the fire and that's a big for
sure for sure.

Love,

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