Is she scamming? Or just working? Or neither?

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Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 7:16 pm

I recently started talking to a girl who lives in the Phillipines (I live in midwest USA). I know her name, and I have seen her live on cam - I know she is a real person, because I've asked her to do things on camera (like blowing kisses and waving and so on) so I know she's not a fake.

However, what I would like to know is this - she has brought up money a couple of times (for things, she claims, like 'feminine hygeine' products and to get her cell phone out of hock). I know she's not a scammer, at least not the type we usually deal with. But the thing I suspect is that she is a real person but is mis-representing herself to get money out of me. She's a pretty girl, a young Filipina, and I'm of the mind that she might just be playing me for money by acting like she is interested in me.

I suppose this is a concern even for real-life, but is there any way, any test or something, that I could ask her for to prove that she actually might be interested, rather than just me being a 'job', as it were. I /have/ sent her a small amount of money (only $10 USD) with the condition that she use it for food - I even told her that I would send it to her if she would get something to eat and come back and let me see her eat it on cam, so that I knew she was using it for that purpose - which she /sort of/ did. She bought /something/, but I know it cost her only a fraction of what I sent.

Anyway, I suppose I am asking if anyone can think of anything in particular that I could ask of her that would prove if she is actually interested, or playing me for money. I don't want to ask her to get nude on camera or anything like that - that's just kind of vulgar, and it would feel like I was sort of asking her to prostitute herself - for all I know she really is flat broke and even if she is playing me, it might be the only way she can get money. I have a bit of a 'save the damsel' complex, I will admit, which I know these type of internet-'workers' play on.

Ideas and suggestions would be greatly appreciated from my scam-bait brothers and sisters. Perhaps someone else might be willing to drop her a line just to 'test' her - if she shows romantic interest, I'll have my answer. Please let me know. Thanks in advance.

Moved from Chat.-Capone

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 7:29 pm

JacobDaniel wrote:

I recently started talking to a girl [...] she has brought up money a couple of times [...] it cost her only a fraction of what I sent. [...] I have a bit of a 'save the damsel' complex

Sorry to say this, JD, but I think you are being played here. A person from far abroad has only recently gotten to know a person over internet and is already asking for money while (supposedly) also showing affection before (I assume) really getting to know you sounds shady as heck to me. I may be old fashioned thinking you can't have an online romance like this so easily, but the things you wrote and the parts quoted above make pretty much every single alarm bell in my head ring.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 7:32 pm

Duckling is right - she's a Pinay cam girl. They will quite happily appear on cam and also involve their whole families. Her only interest in you is in you funding her and her family.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 7:39 pm

Yeah, that's pretty much what I figured. I'm going to play her along, refuse to send any more money (I figure it's a $10 lesson learned - pretty cheap at that price) and see what she does and where she goes. I think I was just thrown by her willingness to appear on cam - not an /actual/ scammer, at least not by our definitions for the most part, but definitely not looking for a boyfriend.

Mod ETA:
Good to see you again, Duck, by the way.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 8:09 pm

A lot of lads do use themselves/their pictures in dating scams. Sort of a "proof" that they are real, but there is probably 10 more men (and possibly women) who are on her Skype cam. They start out small ($10) and keep going to see how far they can hook you, then when you stop sending money, they stop responding to your Skype calls/emails/text etc.

The next time she brings up money, tell her you don't feel comfortable talking about that and see what she says and does. Tell her "I would love to help, but I just don't feel comfortable doing that". The ball will be in her court, she may drop money talk for a while and get you further hooked, and then bring up money again. She'll say she wants to come to the US, but she needs help with her Visa/plane ticket/etc. which is another scam all together. She'll leave you waiting at the airport, with flowers and hope for a future, never to be seen again. OR something happened at the airport and there is some excuse (always needing to pay a fee) that is holding her up, can you send money? She'll never walk off a plane and will leave you broken hearted.

I could be wrong, but there is a strong chance that I am right.

To me, the romance/dating scams are the low of the low, they take much more than a victim's money, they steal away a person's inner core and leave them to rebuild a life with no trust, self esteem and feel embarrassment/shame among their friends and family. (They should not feel those things, but they often do and it's hard for them to learn to trust again)

Glad to see you around! Razz

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 8:15 pm

Oh, yeah, Buddy, I've done all that. I've told her flat out 'I am not sending any more money until I am 100% about you' and she accepts it for the nonce, and then, a couple hours later (or whenever I talk to her again) she'll bring it up again. The first time it was 'for food', which I why I sent it. Then it was to get some 'feminine hygiene' products because she apparently just started her cycle. The most recent one was to get her cell phone out of hock (and she actually gave me the model type to add credibility) so she could talk to me on a more regular basis.

I only fell for the first one - after that I smelled a rat, so I came here before I got any deeper in.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 8:30 pm

Just tread lightly Jacob, these scammers are really good!

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 9:15 pm

You have received some good advice here. By no means do I concentrate on romance lads, but I dabble.

Suggestion 1: There are many nuances to rom scams. Grab a mentor, practice some straight baiting first, and then come back when you are hardened to how ruthless they are.

Suggestion 2. While I think you should drop this particular scammer, if you want to find out how low-down they can be, simply tell them you can not send the money because you're three months past due on your rent and if you don't pay it by X-day, you'll be out on the street. Or your wallet was stolen and you just have enough to get dinner for that day.

Suggestion 3. Follow suggestion 1, skip 2 and completely drop this scammer. I just realized, you sent money to them. They have real life info on you. We cannot stress enough how important it is to protect your identity while participating in this hobby. These are criminals.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 9:22 pm

bware319, I'm not new to this. I'm a /baiter/ - I've been through the mentor program, I've graduated, and I know all these things. I don't mean to be a jerk, but...you missed a lot in rushing to reply.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 9:30 pm

Quote:

... Then it was to get some 'feminine hygiene' products because she apparently just started her cycle....

I always find it amusing when they go that route. It's like they believe a man will send money just to shut them up about their period. You should have asked about her "flow" (is she light or heavy?) and tell her you have an old box of Tampax and Kotex that an old girlfriend left, and you could send those and which does she prefer? Evil Lol

I forget the term for the period lads, that excuse for money is very common her in the dating forum.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 10:00 pm

JacobDaniel wrote:

bware419ers, I'm not new to this. I'm a /baiter/ - I've been through the mentor program, I've graduated, and I know all these things. I don't mean to be a jerk, but...you missed a lot in rushing to reply.

And I don't mean to be a bitch, but I caught this part:

JacobDaniel wrote:

I /have/ sent her a small amount of money (only $10 USD) with the condition that she use it for food

We know lads lie. Sure, I'll:
Use the money for food
Give it to the orphans
Send you your $10.3 Million.
Deliver your trunk box

This is from 2010. Source here.

Around the world, how far can you get with $10?

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 10:04 pm

You can get two subs in Connecticut for $10? Dang, you're lucky to get one here in California!

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 11:49 pm

Yes, I sent her $10. I admitted that. And very shortly after that I twigged, which is why I came here and submitted it to my baiter brothers and sisters.

Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2014 12:22 am

Just out of curiosity, how do we know this person is a scam artist (versus a "professional girlfriend" or straight-up beggar, etc.). Did this person say they were in one location when they were in another? Or is the person you are talking to not the same as the girl on the cam? In your original post, I thought you said you were talking to the real girl and that she was upfront in her request for money. So what's the scam?

Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2014 1:23 am

^We don't know and neither does the OP (Wait a minute here...) hence the Title of the Thread.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Mar 2012 Posts: 5373

@Padme-these scammers will show themselves on video. Sometimes it is a brother or a husband writing emails. They take what they can from their vics and will sometimes encourage them to do a few things that they can hold for blackmail (masturbating videos/or the "I'm only 16" "I'll turn you in if you don't pay").
Some will get their vics to their country where they will be held for randsome.

@JacobDaniel: I don't have any advice other than letting you know that I'm sorry that you found yourself in this position. I know it was only $10.00 but they are very crafty at appearing as if they are victims who are in love with you. This surely had to take a toll and I hope you find comfort in knowing that you got out now. I know you are a baiter however some healing time wouldn't be a bad thing. Regroup, heal, and when you are ready (if you want) you can always pick up a new lad and bait away.

Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2014 5:15 am

@Ginger Thanks, but I'm cool. I went in a little suspicious, which is why I only sent $10. Like I said, lesson learned, and at a relatively cheap price at that.

@Oscarpiles I figured it was a variation on a love-scam when she wouldn't stop asking for money (for her feminine hygiene and cell phone, among other things). I SHOULD have known off the bat, but I let myself be blinded by the 'damsel in distress' bit, and the fact that she WAS willing to show on cam. I'm so used to scammers hiding behind stolen photos and whatnot that when she appeared on cam I was taken aback and it took me a bit to catch back up.

@padme We're working on the assumption that she pretty much is a pro or a beggar. The 'scam' she's working is the 'we will be together soon' angle - like a combination pro-girl and love-scammer. Just with the added bonus that she actually IS a real girl and can show cam to make it more convincing.

Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2014 5:41 am

JacobDaniel wrote:

I don't mean to be a jerk, but...

Then don't be. I don't ever want to see you using me graduating you as an argument against a crewmate like that again.

Signed,
Former mentor.

Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2014 5:31 pm

JacobDaniel wrote:

@padme We're working on the assumption that she pretty much is a pro or a beggar. The 'scam' she's working is the 'we will be together soon' angle - like a combination pro-girl and love-scammer. Just with the added bonus that she actually IS a real girl and can show cam to make it more convincing.

Ok. Your other post asking folks to bait her threw me off as we do not typically bait beggars and professional girlfriends here. I also missed the part of your correspondence where she said she was going to be with you soon. In any event, sorry to hear you had a bad encounter.

Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2014 8:48 pm

Would it make you feel any better to know that "she" could easily be "he" even if you saw her on cam? A not insignificant member of the Pinay "girls" are actually transgender, or "ladyboy" - some posing as girls, some running gay scams.

Contrary to somewhat popular belief, it can be very difficult to tell the difference between female and transgender. Here's an example of how difficult it can be:
http://www.playbuzz.com/hippyh10/lady-or-ladyboy-can-you-tell-which-ones-are-the-real-ladies I ran through it very quickly, without spending any time looking for signs, and got 7/10 right.

Much of the time, straight or gay, Pinay scammers WILL appear on camera, and often their family members do as well. Being gay in Philippines is nowhere near as taboo as it is in Africa so there is a greater percentage targeting gay men.

Some of the pinay camgirls tread the line (or cross it) between camgirl and prostitute. They will meet their marks and will have sex (for more money of course.) Others will avoid meeting their marks in person, or if they do meet them, will make sure they are never alone with them. But these women may be married already, and whether they are married or not, have no intention of leaving their home country or their families.

Some make no secret of the fact that they are chatting with others. We had an upset gentleman earlier this year who tried to post a Pinay on scamwarners. He had really sent money(quite a bit)--but when he provided his chat logs, she had openly acknowledged that there were others. She wasn't a scammer--he just didn't listen. He had just assumed she would drop them all when she had never promised any such thing.

And some of the Pinays on camera are simply young women who are simply trying to survive, who would gladly marry a rich westerner who could provide a secure and happy home. You will see more of these on the camgirl sites, where sitting and performing in front of the camera is a job, plain and simple.

The problem is, it is extremely difficult to tell the difference. And that's why you see very few Pinay baits here--unless she is already posted and you have enough to know up front that she is a definite scammer, you need to assume there is a possibility she is real and it is not baitable.

Posted: Thu Nov 27, 2014 8:43 pm

A couple of years ago my son 'met' a girl online on a dating website. She was Thai.
Now... before you all take a collective 'Ah well, they are bad'... his first wife is Thai and she's lovely. They are divorced but we are very close... no, he didn't meet that one on a dating website.

The lovely Jasmin wasn't known to me for quite some time. Then when he told me about her and how much in love he was I got to know about the money he had been sending her. You know.. mother is in hospital, there's floods in Bangkok we need a rowing boat (yes, real). He even went to see her a couple of times and came back even more smitten... and broke.

He sent her money for her Visa to come to the UK... she would find something it needed to be spent on.

In the end he even bought her a very expensive engagement ring and went to Bangkok and married her..... then had to go back the next year and get divorced when she ran out of excuses as to why she wouldn't come here to live with him.

This started out as a nice, gentle looking girl on a webcam. I wasn't aware of anything until too late... I'm horribly hard nosed and never believe anyone's stories. I don't say 'I told you so'... oh but I would like to.

It starts out as a few £'s for something small... once they know you'll send to them, it grows little by little and before long you're a soft touch.

Get rid of this girl.. honestly if she needs you to buy her Tampax she's got no shame anyway !

Posted: Thu Nov 27, 2014 10:25 pm

Quote:

Now... before you all take a collective 'Ah well, they are bad'

I would never judge a person by their nationality/race/ethnicity. I judge them by their actions and their heart!

I am sorry your son was taken advantage of. Sad

Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 9:24 am

Quote:

Get rid of this girl.. honestly if she needs you to buy her Tampax she's got no shame anyway !

Ask her if she needs the kind that she pushes in, or the kind that she'll need a hammer for.

http://www.snopes.com/embarrass/feminine/tampax.asp

Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 9:28 am

It took a long time for Adam to believe she was a scammer....and even now he is still a little in denial. He got things on credit cards for her and so the pain lasts a long time.

If they weren't good they wouldn't make any money.... but they are good... and behind the pretty smiles and waving at the camera there lies an evil heart that you'll never see.

Actually I would play with this little scammer and her phone in hock for a while... she may have given the make and model... doesn't mean it's in hock.

You are armed with knowledge now... punish her a little.....

Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2014 9:48 am

Doomangel, that is not good advice and frankly not in line with the forum policy. This scammer has the OP's RL information. It is not baiting safely to "punish her a little" when she has his skype number etc.

I'm locking this thread.

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