Pandering

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Posted: Thu Jul 10, 2014 5:32 am

This was a FMF lad who contacted me. His name is ridiculous, but "Panders" is close enough & describes him well. I didn't think it would go anywhere, but I got an ominous request today, so figured I'd post this & see where it goes. This started around June 25 as an exchange on FMF, and then moved to email July 2.

Quote:

its Panders the man on fishmeetfish, how are you doing today..i think we are getting along so good dear

Hi! So good to hear from you! I was beginning to wonder if you'd disappeared. Syria is a dangerous place to be right now, from what I'm seeing on TV.

Who is J---- staying with while you are deployed? do you get to call her often?

Anyway, it really is good to hear from you! I'm getting overwhelmed with emails on FMF and I'm going to be removing my profile from there. I've also found out that I will need to be moving back to B- Oregano as the job I moved to H- for is not going to work out. The good news is my job in B- is still open and it pays better LOL. I will go back to super vising a crew, but I won't be Vice President of Scheduling like I hoped. Oh well. My mother lives back in B- and I will move into her house next week.

How long are you going to be deployed? I have never written to anyone in the military before, but I like this idea! What did you do on Friday?

Looking forwrad to hearing from U!
K

Quote:

wow you are such a great writer dear.. yes i also deleted my profile, J---- stays with my sister inlaw,, ok how much does your current job pay? i will not dissapear dear...you make me smile..be safe ok..reply when you have the chance

So... culturally (in my neck of the woods and his fishing territory) it's an insult to ask someone what they earn, so I am going to encourage that behavior Smile

Hi! That was a great quick response!

How many brothers or sisters do you have? I'm an only child in my family. My job pays $96k per year, and I had health benefits in B-. It's pretty awesome but I didn't realize in H- they have no health insurance because they did not buy into the national insurance so when I pay my own insurance in H- it costs me $12k per year. In B-, I'll still make $96k per year but I have health insurance there so it's like getting a $12k raise!! What does the military pay per year? I have no idea at all what they pay and I guess I have never thought to ask. You can teach me Smile

It's very late here tho and I am heading off to bed. Sweat dreams!

Quote:

i earn 7k on a month i will teach you when you are awake ok, i am also the only kid of my parents but they passed dear..your salary is how much monthly?, be safe good night but reply this before you sleep ok...

Darn, if only $96K were somehow easily divisible by 12. Sigh... lad math.

hi!

See, I knew there was a reason we got along so well! We are both secluded solitary kids with no sniblings or brothers! I'm sorry to hear about your parents passing. How long ago was that? My dad died when I was very young, and my mother married a wonderful man but he died when I was 22. I have had two daddies I loved very much. Mom is my only family left now.

Ok, so after taxes I make $4000 a month, but moving back to mom's house means I have no rent payals so that's saving me at least $1100 a month. Pretty cool, huh?! I keep forgetting you military guys don't have to pay taxes. That's pretty sweet.

I like talking to you!
smiles

Quote:

i lost daddy when i was 19 and then i stayed with mom untill she passsed i was 34, its was so hard on me i wish it never happened, yes its so sweet dear, so tell me more about you,its pretty cool talking to you dear, sorry for the late replies i have been gone for patrol...hope to hear from u soon
Pandering

Hi dear,

no worries, I understand you have your work to do. I do too - I'm on a short break now, but wanted to check to see if you had emailed me again Smile

#smileface

I have a friend who is pregnant and i go to her baby classes (called lamas class) every Monday night with her. Haha we say I am the baby daddy since her husband is gone now. I help her with the class that will teach her how to have the baby naturally. I might not get a chance tonight to say hello again but wanted you to know why if I am quiet to night.

tell me about your patrole - that sounds very brave!!

Quote:

wow patrol is something you dont want to know about, hahaha,.daddy? you are so funny omo aye, have nothing to worry about i am at the base now and i will be here for a while, so we could talk here ok...send me your pictures here babe

HA! your right I won't ask about patrol.

Honey, I am still unpacking from my move here and getting ready for the move back to B-, and I don't have photos other than the one that is on the site. I can resend that to you if you like - a good friend took that but she promised me she will do a "glamor shot" once I get settled in back in B-. I've been under stress for a while and hate how I look in photos. Hopefully when the second move is over, my stress will go away!

OK break is over and I have to get back to the crew reports...
hugs,
K

Quote:

ok thats good talk when you are back ok, be safe dear

So I was bored with a few scraggly lads, and sent a similar note to the duds see if any of them would bite:

Have you ever taken the myers briggs? I am an INTJ. What are you, dear?
http://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test

Note: for the record I am not, nor have I ever been, an INTJ. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Quote:

hello dear how are you doing, i have been on patrol would you care to join me,,lol.how are you today and also tell me what you look for in a partner dear..this plave is so cold...wht are you doing?

hi! the myers briggs will tell you what I want in a partner Wink

take it and tell me what your type is!

Quote:

i am sorry i do not know what you mean can you please tell me that yourself ..lol

[sent a duplicate of the link]

Quote:

honey i do not know what i am dear, tell me what do you think i am? please make this clear i dont understand

Now, this got interesting because I mixed up my lads & sent a slap to this one instead of another one:

Wow. I took the love language online test for you [I didn't], can you please click the link I sent and just move the sliders to find out what you are? I can't tell you that - it's a personality test. Pretty please? I thought you liked this because you mentioned the love language. I have done that online test, and it takes a while. Can you please click the link and take the quiz for me, honey?

Quote:

i cannot see any link open that for me and tell me what it is..pls

Quote:

hello dear how are you, what are you doing why do you ignore me dear?

Um... because Monday.

Hi, I'm not ignoring you. Remember I told you I have lamas class tonight with my friend? I'm a little concerned that you are not really reading my emails. I'm going to give you some time to go back and review and see if you can find that link I sent you:-)

And then: OMG!!

Quote:

lol..ok now i see the link baby, i am
esfj how sweet..thanks for showing me all this baby, what are you doing now and is the class over now?

Now... I am not naive enough to think the lad actually took the online test, but he would have had to at least skim over the site, and then determine what the results of the test might be so he could copy & paste an answer. I am rewarding him for time spent Not Scamming Victims.

Hi! Awesome - thanks for doing that! I'll look at our types and see how compatible we are. Yes, class is over but it was a lot of fun. Lots of pregnant women talking about the false contarctions (I think they are called boxon hicks or something) that women go through before having babies. We learned about deep breathing techniques and other fun stuff, and we visualized being dophins.

Now I'm going through boxes to figure out where I put a few things. Moving is a bizitch. How are you doing, dear? How was your day? How long are you going to be deployed? I bet you miss your sweet J----. Do you get to hear from her very much? I bet she misses her daddy.

I'm grabbing a little late night late night pizza and then heading to bed. I hope you have sweet dreams about good days and no patrol stuff haunting you at night Smile

Hugs,
K

PS thank you again for doing that test - it's a very important indicator! That was sweet of you to humor me.

And then, I did something dumb... I mixed up the lads again! Instead of sending this to the lad who was about to twig, I sent it to this guy who is obedient and dutiful:

Hi honey, here is the link
http://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test
it is a personality test. I'm surprised you don't know your type - most corporations have everyone do this, and I thought the military did too? OK, this is something you really ought to know anyway dear. What is your personality type? Which four letters?

Smile

However, still eager to please, the lad scoured the site and then found another type to send me.

Quote:

mine is ESTJ
Pandering

And then he missed me.

Quote:

how are you doing honey i miss you so much darlin

More rewards for wasting time, and I figured I'd just use the two types he sent as a companionship test.

Quote:

Hi love!!! Oh wow, ESTJ is very compatible with ESFJ and this is such wonderful news for us my dear! We are going to get along very well.

How is your day going today? I am having a good day, and your note just put a BIG smile on my face!!! Hugs to you, honey!
xoxo

Posted: Thu Jul 10, 2014 5:44 am

So, lad has passed my obedience test. Now, on to more fun:

Quote:

Ok babe, what are you doing dear..waiting for your response

hi honey! I am typin gon the computer. What are you up to now? Looking fervored to hearing from u!! Smile

Quote:

its been a wonderful day so far, we had patrol and then the meeting with the joint chief of army, i hope you are doing good and i hope you ate something..so tell me more, what car do you drive?

hi hon,

This year I decided to splurge so I bought a new 2014 Camaro. It's noisier than I thought it would be - the older ones are really cool and I wouldn't mind driving a classic (my second dad had one in the 80s) but of course there are no air bags or other safety features and the old ones are gas guzzliers. This one gets at least 19 mpg, so I'm happy. It's a very cool car - have you seen them? I can start the car from a parking lot away by pushing a button, and on cold nights the seats warm up for me and the heater turns on so the car is toasty warm by the time I get in it. What are you driving?

How cool that you got to meet with such an important person! Your unit must be very hidden and out of the way to stay out of the news. Is it a small unit?

I did get something to eat - our office ordered pizza for lunch and we had a large fruit salad and cake for dessert. Thanks for asking! Are you doing the MRS thing? I've heard the Meals Ready to Serve can be quite tasty, but I've never had one. Do they give you regular cooked food too?

OK dear I have to get back to work and might not be able to chat until I get off.
Hugs!

Quote:

thats so cool dear, i drive a Bmw x5,chevrolet truck, and i have a sport..they are really cool i do not bother to get new ones i am ok with them..your car must be very cool, maybe one day we will sit in there and turn off the heater because we are together,lol..yes its a small unit but we are fine..its ok chat when you are free ok...kisses and hugs
Pandering

Quote:

and of course we take regular cooked foods thats what keeps us going dear,,i have to rest a bit now babe, please drop me a message so i could see when i am up..be safe ok..kisses and hugs

Hi! you have cool cars Smile

What are you driving right now?

Today was a lovely day, and I had a nice time at work. I really enjoy my work and I like the team here. They are all good people. We have a new contract in town which is a GREAT thing for our paychecks, but it means I have to join the work crew often to help get things done until we can hire more help. I know when you are back here you won't have any problem finding work my dear. There are so many jobs starting to become available, and companies are having to pay a lot because there aren't enough workers. If you want a civilian job when you get back, talk to me about it LOL.

Have a good rest. You must be ehxuated!
xoxoxo

Literal lad is literal.

Quote:

i got my email on a speaker so i can hear evry single thing when i am sleeping, i do not drive here, of course i am on deployment we move with the patrol van!! Lol i do not want a civilian job, J---- will when shes grown and you might be her mama.Lol...and of course i am not exhausted i am a soldier..haha..chat i am here ok

Seriously? Speakers? I shall take advantage of this fact at 3am lad time. Yes, yes I shall.

you have such a great sense of humor!! I bet J---- laughs a lot and has a nice personality like her daddy. She must really miss her mother.
So how do you set up sound on email? please tell me - that is intruging!
#smileface

Quote:

i didnt really set a sound i just wore an headset so when i get an email notification it sounds so loud in my ear and i just wakeup..lol, how are you and what tie is it there? what are yu doing i missed our conversation, why dont you download a yahoo messenger maybe i could help you create a yahoo mail...yes she misses me so much and she loves to laugh because i am funny

Yes, you are funny. Time to get stupid.

Where do i find a yahoo messgner? Help me with this pls? Smile

And it was this response that made me decide to put the lad on my top priority list:

Quote:

do you have a yahoo email? if no give me your full name your number,date of birth and your password so i can help u get a create your yahoo mail ok, then after that you can download the yahoo messenger on internet ok

hi!

nope, that's the problem i don't have yahoo email. I have a work account and my password there is i3prcdN1ps and then I have this gmail account but I don't know what the pw is since it's always logged in and I forgot what I set it to.

LOL u know my name silly, and my number - do you mean phone or ID number?

This stuff is complcates.
#sadface #lotsawork
xoxox

Quote:

babe i am sorry there is lots at work, i want to help you open a yahoo email ok, i just need your phone number to enable me do so then i need your date of birth and also is your last name BaiterCity? xoxoxo

Um, because my character's name is common so I appended the city to the email. Lad hasn't figured this out.

Hi!
ok we are in luck. There is a guy here at my work who says he can help me set it up. sweetheart thank you so much for your offer to help i know u are really busy on parol and this has to be a total pain in the rectum for you to have to deal with me and my lack of skillz. I'm so sory!

Chris is going to help me get the yaoho set up so you and i can chat. it might not be until later today but i will let u know when it is ready ok?

xoxo

Quote:

ok baby i will be there waiting for you babe, i have a meeting now to atttend after that i will be free dear, this is my yahoo mail [email protected] me up when you are freee, i am not complaining you dont know what to do, we are all humans ok..kisses and hugs

Hi!

OMG I am dumb. So i got set up with an id and I got home to try to chat, but I'm realising that the yahoo program is on my computer at work where i am not allowed to chat. I am going to ask Chris to come to my house this weekend and install the program for me so I can use it with you.

Honey I'm so sorry and I can tell you're already thinking O God What Did I Get Into Here With This Chick and please know i will try harder in the future to get this right.

What are you wearing? I like leather #littlewinky

xo