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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon

Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17379
Location: Leading my wolf pack

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Posted:
Sun Jun 22, 2014 1:10 pm |
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During Scammer Saturday 7, I spoke to a morphed Lad who took exception to my chop:
http://www.4shared.com/mp3/_1ZVWJkZba/SS7_Yastreb_to_Barr_Nura_and_T.html
"She" called me what sounded like a "churszha" and I asked "Is that in the Monster Manual"?*
So, you players of fantasy RPGs - with just that... what sort of monster is a "Churszha"?
*It was supposed to be "church rat", but I was enjoying the confusion. |
_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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Pastor Frank
Baiting Guru

Joined: 31 Jan 2007
Posts: 12237

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Posted:
Sun Jun 22, 2014 1:13 pm |
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| Yastreb wrote: |
| what sort of monster is a "Churszha"? |
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_________________ "Father Juan are sure that you are man of God,because your behaviors showed you as unbeliever" -Mary R |
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TheDane
Baiting Guru

Joined: 13 Aug 2010
Posts: 5165
Location: Meanwhile, somewhere else...

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Posted:
Sun Jun 22, 2014 1:15 pm |
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^ Nah, he ain't got no chutzpah. |
_________________
x122 x3 x2 x2 x13
Trafalgar Square 2013
Goat Milk Lad 2012-13:
Lagos-Ouagadougou-Arbinda Warri-Yaoundé
I AM A FOOL AND I AM SO DISAPPOINTED - Brother Okei AKA Goat Milk Lad
I do not wish my enemy what I have experienced and this humiliation you are putting me through - Rushforth (on behalf of Dharma & Dr Mike) |
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Duckling
Elite Baiter

Joined: 13 Jul 2013
Posts: 1793
Location: Not quite there yet

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Posted:
Sun Jun 22, 2014 1:28 pm |
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Churszha is something that wanted to be a Tarrasque when it grows up but ended up being a Flumph. |
_________________
Sloth: "Your lies are so absurd that you made me stranded in another man’s land! Kindly don’t write back or reply my message again because if you do my God Almighty will purnish and destroy you in JESUS’ name! AMEN."
"You are very stupid! Do you hear me?! Stupid is your name!" -Lovely Laura
"I will take your name and use it for the Money Ritual!" -Lovely Laura again.
"I will send you a letter bomb. Don't worry, I will send Boko Haram to your country." -Boko Boy.
"Ogun kill you your family go die this year!" -David the Payment Agent |
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Bort
Elite Baiter

Joined: 22 Apr 2011
Posts: 1652
Location: The land of crocodiles, drop-bears and corrupt premiers

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Posted:
Sun Jun 22, 2014 1:40 pm |
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Guys, I think I found it!
| Quote: |
Churszha:
Size/Type: Colossal Magical Beast
Hit Dice: 48d10+594 (858 hp)
Initiative: +7
Speed: 20 ft. (4 squares)
Armor Class: 35 (-8 size, +3 Dex, +30 natural), touch 5, flat-footed 32
Base Attack/Grapple: +48/+81
Attack: Bite +57 melee (4d8+17/18-20/×3)
Full Attack: Bite +57 melee (4d8+17/18-20/×3) and 2 horns +52 melee (1d10+8 ) and 2 claws +52 melee (1d12+8 ) and tail slap +52 melee (3d8+8 )
Space/Reach: 30 ft./20 ft.
Special Attacks: Augmented critical, frightful presence, improved grab, rush, swallow whole
Special Qualities: Carapace, damage reduction 15/epic, immunity to fire, poison, disease, energy drain, and ability damage, regeneration 40, scent, spell resistance 32
Saves: Fort +38, Ref +29, Will +20
Abilities: Str 45, Dex 16, Con 35, Int 3, Wis 14, Cha 14
Skills: Listen +17, Search +9, Spot +17, Survival +14 (+16 following tracks)
Feats: Alertness, Awesome Blow, Blind-Fight, Cleave, Combat Reflexes, Dodge, Great Cleave, Improved Bull Rush, Improved Initiative, Iron Will, Power Attack, Toughness (6)
Environment: Any
Organization: Solitary
Challenge Rating: 20
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always neutral
Advancement: 49+ HD (Colossal)
Level Adjustment: —
The Churszha is 70 feet long and 50 feet tall, and it weighs about 130 tons.
The Churszha cannot speak.
Combat
The Churszha attacks with its claws, teeth, horns, and tail.
The Churszha’s natural weapons are treated as epic weapons for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction.
Augmented Critical (Ex)
The Churszha’s bite threatens a critical hit on a natural attack roll of 18-20, dealing triple damage on a successful critical hit.
Frightful Presence (Su)
The Churszha can inspire terror by charging or attacking. Affected creatures must succeed on a DC 36 Will save or become shaken, remaining in that condition as long as they remain with 60 feet of the Churszha. The save DC is Charisma-based.
Improved Grab (Ex)
To use this ability, the Churszha must hit a Huge or smaller opponent with its bite attack. It can then attempt to start a grapple as a free action without provoking an attack of opportunity. If it wins the grapple check, it establishes a hold and can try to swallow the foe the following round.
Rush (Ex)
Once per minute, the normally slow-moving Churszha can move at a speed of 150 feet.
Swallow Whole (Ex)
The Churszha can try to swallow a grabbed opponent of Huge or smaller size by making a successful grapple check. Once inside, the opponent takes 2d8+8 points of crushing damage plus 2d8+6 points of acid damage per round from the Churszha’s digestive juices. A swallowed creature can cut its way out by dealing 50 points of damage to the Churszha’s digestive tract (AC 25). Once the creature exits, muscular action closes the hole; another swallowed opponent must cut its own way out. The Churszha’s gullet can hold 2 Huge, 8 Large, 32 Medium, 128 Small, or 512 Tiny or smaller creatures.
Carapace (Ex)
The Churszha’s armorlike carapace is exceptionally tough and highly reflective, deflecting all rays, lines, cones, and even magic missile spells. There is a 30% chance of reflecting any such effect back at the caster; otherwise, it is merely negated. Check for reflection before rolling to overcome the creature’s spell resistance.
Regeneration (Ex)
No form of attack deals lethal damage to the Churszha. The Churszha regenerates even if it fails a saving throw against a disintegrate spell or a death effect. If the Churszha fails its save against a spell or effect that would kill it instantly (such as those mentioned above), the spell or effect instead deals nonlethal damage equal to the creature’s full normal hit points +10 (or 868 hp). The Churszha is immune to effects that produce incurable or bleeding wounds, such as mummy rot, a sword with the wounding special ability, or a clay golem’s cursed wound ability.
The Churszha can be slain only by raising its nonlethal damage total to its full normal hit points +10 (or 868 hit points) and using a wish or miracle spell to keep it dead.
If the Churszha loses a limb or body part, the lost portion regrows in 1d6 minutes (the detached piece dies and decays normally). The creature can reattach the severed member instantly by holding it to the stump.
Skills
The Churszha has a +8 racial bonus on Listen and Spot checks. |
ETA: Ninja'd by Duckling... well, sort of. |
_________________
x25
"After the IRS approved our form i became very joyful and much expectant of the money... now i am feeling so bad about the whole thing", "I feel like crying my eyes out of it sockets" - Ozzy Warri-Lome (w/ Big X)
"GOD WILL GORGE YOU, BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW A CRIMINAL LIKE YOU", "I BELIEVE YOU ARE A DEVIL INCANATE", "I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE KIND OF HUMAN ARE YOU" - Rev Nachaat
"god will surely judge you for all you have made me gone through", "STOP PLAYING DIRTY GAMES WITH ME", "OGUN WILL KILL ALL YOU ALL" - Scott Larry Benin City-Sokoto
Leaked Emma Watson/Emily Kinney sextape |
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Dr Mike
Baiting Guru

Joined: 14 Jun 2010
Posts: 3264
Location: Due north

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Posted:
Sun Jun 22, 2014 2:28 pm |
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130 tons, they got one thing right at least. |
_________________
       X10
Trafalgar Square 2013
X 24 Random safaris
X 12 Welcome to Sweden
X 9 Chadian minister of tourism project
X 9 Rame Head pilgrimage
Rame Head 2013
Globe of Gluttony
CBC Documentary Safari |
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TheDane
Baiting Guru

Joined: 13 Aug 2010
Posts: 5165
Location: Meanwhile, somewhere else...

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Posted:
Sun Jun 22, 2014 3:06 pm |
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^ Yeah, SOOI did mention he lost weight... |
_________________
x122 x3 x2 x2 x13
Trafalgar Square 2013
Goat Milk Lad 2012-13:
Lagos-Ouagadougou-Arbinda Warri-Yaoundé
I AM A FOOL AND I AM SO DISAPPOINTED - Brother Okei AKA Goat Milk Lad
I do not wish my enemy what I have experienced and this humiliation you are putting me through - Rushforth (on behalf of Dharma & Dr Mike) |
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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon

Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17379
Location: Leading my wolf pack

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Posted:
Sun Jun 22, 2014 9:18 pm |
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Well, maybe the Lad gave me a compliment (after a fashion). |
_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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Scamzilla
Master Baiter

Joined: 01 Jun 2014
Posts: 193
Location: Hangoversville, USA

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Posted:
Mon Jun 23, 2014 9:46 am |
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It looks like something from Pacific Rim, or as I call it, The Other Godzilla Movie. |
_________________ Just leave me be and let me play with my Rubik's Cube. x6
<a href="/forum/donate.php">[Click here to donate to 419Eater.com]</a> |
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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon

Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17379
Location: Leading my wolf pack

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Posted:
Mon Jun 23, 2014 10:06 am |
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I thought that the Churshza would be small, sneaky, and cowardly - sorta like a Lad, really. |
_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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Bort
Elite Baiter

Joined: 22 Apr 2011
Posts: 1652
Location: The land of crocodiles, drop-bears and corrupt premiers

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Posted:
Mon Jun 23, 2014 10:22 am |
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^Well, if the behemoth above wasn't it, then maybe...
| Quote: |
Churszha:
Size/Type: Small Humanoid (Reptilian)
Hit Dice: 1d8 (4 hp)
Initiative: +1
Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares)
Armor Class: 15 (+1 size, +1 Dex, +1 natural, +2 leather), touch 12, flat-footed 14
Base Attack/Grapple: +1/-4
Attack: Spear +1 melee (1d6-1/×3) or sling +3 ranged (1d3-1)
Full Attack: Spear +1 melee (1d6-1/×3) or sling +3 ranged (1d3-1)
Space/Reach:5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: —
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60 ft., light sensitivity
Saves: Fort +2, Ref +1, Will -1
Abilities: Str 9, Dex 13, Con 10, Int 3, Wis 1, Cha 5.
Skills: Craft (trapmaking) +2, Hide +6, Listen +2, Move Silently +2, Search +2, Spot +2, Form Writing +8, Sense Motive -20
Feats: Superior Intelligent
Environment: Temperate forests
Organization: Gang (4-9), band (10-100 plus 100% noncombatants plus 1 3rd-level sergeant per 20 adults and 1 leader of 4th-6th level), warband (10-24 plus 2-4 dire weasels), tribe (40-400 plus 1 3rd-level sergeant per 20 adults, 1 or 2 lieutenants of 4th or 5th level, 1 leader of 6th-8th level, and 5-8 dire weasels)
Challenge Rating: ¼
Treasure: Standard
Alignment: Usually lawful evil
Advancement: By character class
Level Adjustment: +0
Churszhas are short, reptilian humanoids with cowardly and sadistic tendencies.
A Churszha has scaly skin and glowing red eyes. Its tail is nonprehensile. Churszhas wear ragged clothing, favoring tight blue shirts, manbags and the police uniforms of their uncles and/or brothers. A Churszha is 2 to 2½ feet tall and weighs 35 to 45 pounds. Churszhas speak Draconic with a voice that sounds like that of a yapping dog.
Combat
Churszhas like to attack with overwhelming odds—at least two to one—or trickery; should the odds fall below this threshold, they usually flee. However, they attack gnomes on sight if their numbers are equal.
They begin a fight by slinging bullets, closing only when they can see that their foes have been weakened. Whenever they can, Churszhas set up ambushes near trapped areas.
Light Sensitivity (Ex)
Churszhas are dazzled in bright sunlight or within the radius of a daylight spell.
Skills
Churszhas have a +2 racial bonus on Craft (trapmaking), Profession (miner), and Search checks.
The Churszha warrior presented here had the following ability scores before racial adjustments: Str 13, Dex 11, Con 12, Int 3, Wis 1, Cha 5.
Challenge Rating
Churszhas with levels in NPC classes have a CR equal to their character level -3. |
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_________________
x25
"After the IRS approved our form i became very joyful and much expectant of the money... now i am feeling so bad about the whole thing", "I feel like crying my eyes out of it sockets" - Ozzy Warri-Lome (w/ Big X)
"GOD WILL GORGE YOU, BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW A CRIMINAL LIKE YOU", "I BELIEVE YOU ARE A DEVIL INCANATE", "I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE KIND OF HUMAN ARE YOU" - Rev Nachaat
"god will surely judge you for all you have made me gone through", "STOP PLAYING DIRTY GAMES WITH ME", "OGUN WILL KILL ALL YOU ALL" - Scott Larry Benin City-Sokoto
Leaked Emma Watson/Emily Kinney sextape
Last edited by Bort on Tue Jun 24, 2014 1:44 pm; edited 2 times in total |
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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon

Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17379
Location: Leading my wolf pack

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Posted:
Mon Jun 23, 2014 11:42 am |
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That's the little monster! |
_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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TheDane
Baiting Guru

Joined: 13 Aug 2010
Posts: 5165
Location: Meanwhile, somewhere else...

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Posted:
Mon Jun 23, 2014 12:25 pm |
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| Bort wrote: |
Int 10
Feats: Superior Intelligent |
Something is wrong here...  |
_________________
x122 x3 x2 x2 x13
Trafalgar Square 2013
Goat Milk Lad 2012-13:
Lagos-Ouagadougou-Arbinda Warri-Yaoundé
I AM A FOOL AND I AM SO DISAPPOINTED - Brother Okei AKA Goat Milk Lad
I do not wish my enemy what I have experienced and this humiliation you are putting me through - Rushforth (on behalf of Dharma & Dr Mike) |
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Bort
Elite Baiter

Joined: 22 Apr 2011
Posts: 1652
Location: The land of crocodiles, drop-bears and corrupt premiers

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Posted:
Tue Jun 24, 2014 1:42 pm |
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^ Good point. It has now been corrected.  |
_________________
x25
"After the IRS approved our form i became very joyful and much expectant of the money... now i am feeling so bad about the whole thing", "I feel like crying my eyes out of it sockets" - Ozzy Warri-Lome (w/ Big X)
"GOD WILL GORGE YOU, BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW A CRIMINAL LIKE YOU", "I BELIEVE YOU ARE A DEVIL INCANATE", "I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE KIND OF HUMAN ARE YOU" - Rev Nachaat
"god will surely judge you for all you have made me gone through", "STOP PLAYING DIRTY GAMES WITH ME", "OGUN WILL KILL ALL YOU ALL" - Scott Larry Benin City-Sokoto
Leaked Emma Watson/Emily Kinney sextape |
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